Grindrese for Beginners

Grindrese for beginners

Just here for chat" = I'm bored so I'll keep talking to you until I see someone hot to hook up with.

Concerning grindr most guys dont want to chat, they want to screw, if your not attractive move out of their way.


let's meet up" - I'm going to flake on you

"A drink sounds great, how about Saturday night?" - I'm going to flake on you

"How about you come to my place?" - I'm going to flake on you

Looking for friends guys rather often have only a body pic & just sent you a pic of their dick and ass. To be friends you need to see all of this. Of course they want the pics reciprocated to. Oh, and then they ask - are you a top or bottom? Friends need to know.

Bored" = Horny

"I'm here killing time" = I want hookups and am too prudish to just say that outright

Guys who are demanding and angry in their profile. "Hey I'm a real asshole, I think I'm gods gift to the world and I'm probably gonna treat you like shit then blame you for it.

Not into hookups" - Find me on all fours blindfolded, front door open, bareback only.

"Just seeing what's out there..." - After deleting this app daily and then redownloading it because of my love hate relationship with it.

Handsome = "Your face is meh, but I really dig some other aspect."

Don't send dick pics/nudes" - I'm going to ask for 5,000,000,000,000 nudes of you

"In a happy open relationship with the best husband/boyfriend on here!" - I'm cheating on my man and I blocked him on here so he doesn't know that I am.

" *makes fun of masculinity in any way *" - I was bullied/have daddy issues

Ask me" = "It depends on what you look like"

"deleting this soon" = "I'm so desperate from a lack of messages that maybe lying about ditching the app will draw more attention to me"


Guy speak: "sup"

Translation: " wanna fuck? No? NEXT!"

not here for sex" when your profile pic is of your abs and crotch = I'm here for sex but only with those I initiate it with

"Looking for gym buddy" = Looking for fuck buddy who goes to the gym regularly

Looking for friends" = I'm in a sexually dissatisfying relationship and most of my brain thinks I'm looking for friends but a little part knows I want a hot guy's cock shoved up my bum if the opportunity arises.

Looking for a roommate" - Don't bother messaging me if you're not hot because I will just plain out ignore you even if you're interested in the room.

Young professional" - I have a really average job but I wear a suit

Lingo
Thanks = Move on.

Thx = Move on quickly.

Hey handsome = Positive engagement. Possibly fishing outside their category.

lol (lower case) = Polite amusement, questionable engagement.

LOL (all caps) = Engaged, proceed with caution. May be false enthusiasm. You may be funny but not hot.

What’s up? = Proceed with pic or preference query.

More pics? = Everyone has one good photo. You better have more from this decade.

Looking? = Pretty clear they will stick it in anything or get stuck by anything.

You party? = Unless you’re into a wild-eyed, jelly-d*cked uber orifice who looks like Gollum in a jock wearing a baseball hat, keep moving.

Generous? = You are too old or ugly and suspected to have to pay for sex. Block immediately and find younger looking pic.

420/trees = I'm a lazy stoner

Lets meet! Not chat online with it going nowhere" - Too much talking lets people see my personality flaws

The amount of times the word "masc" is mentioned in a profile greatly increases the chance the guy is a bottom.

Or, in my more socially anxious phase: "I'm literally terrified of meeting new people physically, but looking for cute pictures with fun personalities for fantasy fodder."

Which defeats the purpose of looking for friends in the first place if one of the most important things you'll judge them off is your looks.but the obvious plans is to eventually be fucking those friends so.

"Chat" - I'll talk if you're hot.

"can't host or travel": I expect you to be the Uber ANDDomino's of sex....pick me up and deliver dick on demand. Also, I suck at adulting.

Landscape photo: I am an extremely insecure non-white. Please love me.

I'm here for: Networking" = "I'm an escort"

Diamond emoji = "I'm an escort"

Pot of gold at end of rainbow emoji = "I'm an escort"

Rose emoji = "I'm an escort" (usually 2 or 3 roses, of course)

Generous? = You are too old or ugly and suspected to have to pay for sex. Block immediately and find younger looking pic.

Good sex = The reason why this shit is all worth it.

Cuddling, spending the night, and waking up in each others arms = Pipe dream


Top = top

Versatile top = Bottom with issues about bottoming=feminine. Otherwise I'd feel good enough about myself to say I'm a bottom.

Vesatile = bottom

Versatile bottom = bottom

Bottom = power bottom, and bring a friend!

How to get guys you like if you are average

There is not much you can say to get a guy to ast least give you dick/ass.

1. Situation
2. If you dont have a good face, you damn near better have a nice body. Hit that gym

Face =50 to 70 percent




TOPS

1. That chest needs to be big
2. Big arms to shoulders

Versatiles or bottoms

2.  Get rid of all love handles, smooth incline to booty cakes squats will help with that